How do I want this year to be different?
That’s the question I asked myself as the new year lay out before me, full of promise and possibilities. Maybe you asked yourself that question too.
At this time in my life, and maybe in yours, the idea of planning for the coming year seems daunting. If the last year was somewhat overwhelming, maybe it’s time to look past 2012 and paint a bigger picture. If that sounds like even more of a challenge, then consider this: How would it be if we were to look ahead to the next five years and use each year as a time for correction and updates, rather than resolutions and goal setting?
Somehow looking at a bigger picture seems to lessen the dreaded (for me) details of plans and the guilt that follows when they fall by the wayside.
I love the idea of dreaming for the future. It somehow sounds less formidable than making resolutions that we know will be broken within a couple of weeks. You know the ones: Lose 10 pounds, exercise more, make more money. They seem to be the same year after year, at least they have been for me.
When I talk with other women around my age, the biggest things they want for this year are health and wealth. With those two things taken care of, they say they will feel better, do better and be happier.
Why plan for just the year? Why not take a longer view and look at what’s really important. Taking small steps to be where you want to be, have what you want to have and be who you want to be will take away the overwhelm and make what you do today more meaningful and count for more. When we know that we’re headed for something bigger, it’s easier to enjoy the process of getting there.
I’ve often heard that the joy is in the process and that the feeling of accomplishment is fleeting. The afterglow of having helped someone or make life a bit better for someone is what truly lasts. Here are some of the questions I asked myself as I was contemplating making resolutions, something I’ve done for decades.
Where will you be in five years? Will I still be living in this place?
What will you have accomplished in five years? Will that book finally be published?
What will you remember and what will you be remembered for? Did I show gratitude and caring to those I love?
Here’s a simple exercise that will help you get started (if you would like to join me).
Write a letter to yourself looking back five years from today and answer these questions.
- What was your biggest accomplishment in the last five years?
- Who was special in your life in the last five years.
- What did you enjoy the most during the last five years?
Doing this exercise will give you an idea of what you really want to be, do and have.
I’d love to know if any of this worked for you.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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Dolores — this is a wonderful post. I will do the 5-year look-back. I do think it’s more important to nurture someone else’s dream than to lose another 10 pounds. I’m with you on that one. I hope my legacy is that I gave more than I got. I have been lucky. I am surrounded by a large circle of loving family and friends. They count more than making money and losing weight.
Dolores–What an inspiring and timely topic! It is so true that resolutions and goals are usually not met for a variety of reasons. Your approach of “dreaming for the future” sounds so much more appealing than the dreaded resolutions. I will concentrate on making my future brighter by resolving health and wealth issues. I also plan on doing the 5-year retrospective. Thanks for the great idea.
Dolores–Just reading your post gives me an internal sense of peace, calm and hope. It’s interesting that I just sent out an e-newsletter with a similar opinion about “resolutions” for the new year, saying that they are largely non-productive and cause me to feel tension just writing them! I am also a licensed private pilot and your advice about the 5-year check-in reminds me of using a plane’s autopilot. When it’s turned on, the course of the plane is constantly shifting because it is making subtle corrections that keep the aircraft on course in the long run. Finally, it safely reaches the exact destination intended. I like your suggestion and will implement it!